april 15, 1957 - a scribbled note on magazine cover

"caroline left to today. packed up without a sound. without a note. nothing to punctuate the end of eight months of, well, what was it really? i don't know. i let her go, like most everything else, without a fight. without word or worry. what that must have been like for her? to give and give and give and get fractions in return. to put it all out there and never reel anything back in. made of unequal parts, caroline and me. i haven't been able to feel that for some time now. since high school. maybe. to care for something, to love something, to want to be apart of something. of someone. of a greater whole. instead we're just fractions. i don't want that anymore. i want to feel something, care for something, know something, share something. love something enough to not let it walk out the door. "